Are your friends hurting your relationship?

July 14, 2014 at 2:26 pm | Marriage | No comment

are-your-friends-hurting-your-relationshipMost of us want to find a suitable partner with whom we can fall in love and ultimately share our lives. When we finally find that special person and commit to a relationship, we want it to last forever.

However, unlike romantic novels and movies, not all stories have a happy ending and all couples have to face the bumpy ride at some point.

Sometimes, the friends with whom we share our closest secrets and whose advice we seek while facing a troubled relationship might become the cause of a sour relationship.

Seeking a friend’s advice on a relationship may not be the best solution

Every couple is bound to have clashing opinions, as being different individuals, there will be difference in opinion and priorities. When things go out of hand and we do not find a solution, we depend on our friends for advice. We fail to understand that we might end up with a biased opinion, as our friend only gets to know our part of the story. No matter how consoling the advice may be, but it may act like sugar to a diabetic person. We must first acknowledge that there is a problem and then make mutual efforts towards solving it and should rely only on professional assistance if need arises. Visiting a marriage counselor together is a better option, as the he/ she gets to know the view of both the parties and can thus figure out a solution.

Neglecting a relationship makes things worse

The foundation of a happy relationship is a healthy friendship. Sometimes, however we do not understand that our partner can be our best friend and some very happy moments can be created together by sharing in each other’s passions and interests. Paint a canvas, read a book, bake and decorate cookies together; there are ample fun activities which help us connect better. But at times we prefer to spend more time with our bunch of friends at a beer bar, baseball match or shopping and may end up neglecting our partner. It is essential for all couples to spend quality time together and be each other’s close friend.

Striking a healthy balance between relationship and friendship

Friends hold an important place in everyone’s life but you cannot afford to hurt a healthy relationship at the cost of friendship. So there is a need to strike a balance between both. Your best friends may sometimes cause hurt in if you fail to recognize that their advice in your relationship may not be the best one and you need to exercise your own judgment and take time out to understand your partner’s point of view.

A friendship, if it is too demanding may not be worth keeping and sometimes you just need to draw the line. Realize that in a relationship only the two of you can iron out the differences by putting your egos aside and going past the surface level connection.

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